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- GRACIE'S "VISIBLE LANGUAGE" CONTACT EXPERIENCE
- . . . a note from underground
- by "Gracie and Zarkov"
-
- Copyright March 1985 by Gracie and Zarkov Productions. We believe that in
- a truly free society the price of packaged information would be driven
- down to the cost of reproduction and transmission. We, therefore, give
- blanket permission and encourage photocopy, quotation, reprint or entry
- into a database of all or part of our articles provided that the copier
- or quoter does not take credit for our statements.
-
- We each had taken 150 mg of pure MDA. The differences from MDM are
- striking: MDA is more hallucinogenic with noticeable closed eye imagery,
- is a much greater aesthetic enhancer, especially of people and of music;
- is more euphoric; more "drug-like", a heavier and more obviously
- body-involved trip. Tactile sensation is more powerful, erotic and
- noticeable on MDA. Physical effects are more up-front: gastric upset,
- pupil dilation, water retention, limbic arousal. On the whole, we find
- MDA a more enjoyable and interesting trip; longer lasting and more
- sexual/sensual. Our favorite characteristic is that one retains an
- interesting psychedelic ideation on MDA, rather then the
- feeling-oriented, but rather idealess thinking of MDM.
-
- That evening we were very taken with the musical enhancement -- we are
- both avid listeners -- and had found MDM to actually interfere with our
- enjoyment of music. MDA goes especially well with second-rate classical
- music: the lushness and color of Strauss, Lizst, Rimsky-Korsakov,
- Smetana and other ethnic and minor romantic composers are very compatible
- with the sensual fantasy aspects of MDA. We were playing Smetana, "The
- Moldau", a tone poem about the major river in Czechoslovakia.
-
- During the past several weeks, I had had several episodes of allergic
- reaction which were unusual for me. Possible causes included the spring
- weather and flowers, gardening, adjustment to the West Coast, and six
- months of regular DMT use. While the music was playing, I noticed
- increased allergic symptoms. This is unusual on MDA, which as Andrew
- Weil points out, is one of the most powerful allergy suppressors around,
- and so it has always affected me in the past.
-
- Along with the allergic response, I began to note the familiar
- "Goddess-possession" phenomenon which we had first encountered on MDA-LSD
- trips, and which led us to our first profound trips and contact
- experiences. This time it was subtle, perhaps because no LSD was
- involved. At the same time, a series of flashes, "false memories" or
- "past life" reminiscences occurred, having to do with rivers and my
- riverine ancestry, triggered by the content of the music.
-
- This is a characteristic of MDA experience which we had not encountered
- on MDM, where memories are more personal and less archetypal/symbolic.
- With MDA memories one can become caught up in an associative web of
- ancestral material.
-
- During this whole period, I had continuing allergic symptoms. Zarkov felt
- fine and was having a great time. This dichotomy is even more noticeable
- since Zarkov is usually the one with allergy problems. I showered off and
- washed my face but I still felt uncomfortable and uneasy. We have noted
- on several occasions that allergic reactions had preceded profound
- contact trips.
-
- About hour 4, I decided to try smoking some DMT. My blood pressure and
- pulse were only slightly elevated, but I still felt restless and uneasy.
- The week before I had reset an MDM trip with DMT. The DMT seemed to have
- had a calming and healing effect.
-
- I smoked about 40 mg in 4-5 tokes.
-
- As it came on, I asked the DMT entities for help and guidance.
-
- I kept my eyes open until the visual changes became overwhelming. The
- whole room was being transformed into the characteristic DMT
- "crysthanthemum" pattern. I closed my eyes and fell back into the
- trance.
-
- The first thing I saw was the "visible language"! The words, the shapes,
- the "music" (the "music" refers to the DMT auditory effects, not music in
- this reality and the stereo was off during this part of the trip) and the
- voices all carried the same message: "Strong, safe, strong, safe; help,
- ok, ok, help; safe, safe, alright"! The "elves" appeared. They sang/I
- saw/read/felt/heard. They are "made out" of the visible language. The
- message is conveyed by the medium itself in several simultaneous sensory
- modalities. Vision, heard speech, read language, music, song, images and
- pictures all happen at once, so that the meaning is multi-dimensional.
-
- For example, if one were to "see" a cat in this state it would be
- communicated in many ways at once: one would see a picture or cartoon of
- a cat, made out of writhing, colorful strips or segments which are words
- -- "cat, cat, cat, pussy, kitty, pussy, meow, tail, ears, cat, cat, kitty
- . . ." and the picture would be accompanied by a musical description of
- the cat (like "Peter and the Wolf," only more descriptive and precise)
- and by voices singing "cat, cat, kitty, kitty, meow, puss, kittycat . .
- ." which would match the text.
-
- This time I saw the "elves" as multidimensional creatures formed by
- strands of visible language; they were more creaturely than I had ever
- seen them before. The message was changing from the initial "ok, ok,
- safe, safe . . ."
-
- The word changing suggests that this was a time-linear process. I don't
- think this is the case. I believe that during the trance the whole
- message and its variations were there at once, from the start. There is a
- different meaning to time in the DMT state and the notion of linear
- temporal order that we usualiy believe is not valid or useful. All the
- information is always immediately there and the idea of linearity comes
- from our linear habits of attention and the fact that we do not yet know
- how to see/hear/perceive several messages simultaneously and consciously,
- so we string them out for perceptual convenience.
-
- The elves were dancing in and out of the multidimensional visible
- language matrix, "waving" their "arms" and "limbs/hands/fingers?" and
- "smiling" or "laughing," although I saw no faces as such. The elves were
- "telling" me (or I was understanding them to say) that I had seen them
- before, in early childhood. Memories were flooding back of seeing the
- elves: they looked just like they do now: evershifting, folding,
- multidimensional, multicolored (what colors!), always laughing,
- weaving/waving, showing me things, showing me the visible language they
- are created/creatures of, teaching me to speak and read. (Are they are
- linguistic programs made manifest and personified? This throws an
- entirely new light on Terence McKenna's remark at Esalen about language
- being the "most alien artifact" we have!)
-
- Following is a paraphrase of the message content -- all conveyed in the
- multimedia way described earlier (to emphasize, the entire message was
- conveyed via "visible language!")
-
- They "read-protect" their contact with children. "No-no, bye-bye, uh-uh,
- don't tell," is the phrase they used to keep me from remembering or
- telling the grown-ups. They come to you when you are a child. My
- younger brother and I saw them when we were very young. They lived under
- the bed, they played with us, but they only came out when our parents
- weren't around. They showed us things, they showed us meaning and
- language. My brother say them more clearly (perhaps because he was
- younger) then I did. They taught us words - I read earlier than normal
- because of their help.
-
- When I was frightened or anxious, I would crawl under the bed to where it
- was safe, because the "elves" were there. "Bye-bye, uh-uh, don't tell,
- we'll be back," they used to sing.
-
- "I've been seeing it all along," I thought, "the chysthanthemum pattern
- is the elves is the visible language is the message." (however, true
- visions on DMT, like those on mushrooms, are different from these
- patterns, they are real, like seeing with "normal" vision; more like a
- movie or a very vivid dream than like the pattern/cartoon/visible
- language.)
-
- The personal reality of these creatures seems indisputable during the
- contact, but that interpretation runs into my normal skepticism when I am
- out of contact. Is the notion that these are beings merely the obvious
- interpretation of these phenomena by the human mind? Or is something
- else going on that we can only understand by interpreting it as an
- encounter with an alien being?
-
- The visible language and the multidimensional nature of the forms seems
- so clear, but the relationship of these phenomena to me as an individual
- and to the human race in a species-history sense is less clear. I am
- always afraid of repeating the errors of misplaced concreteness (thinking
- the "creatures" are "real") and the dogmatic fallacy (thinking that I
- know what I saw). The most honest answer is that I don't know what I saw
- (do we ever?), but that the description above is my attempt to
- communicate some of what I thought I saw.
-
- The encounter felt profound, exhilarating, and filled with warmth,
- excitement and protection. I was not afraid, but was comforted by the
- experience.
-
- And, after the encounter had ended, I found my allergic symptoms had
- disappeared. I was no longer agitated, but felt calm.
-
- The visible language phenomenon was most interesting -- I felt curious,
- excited, and peculiarly self-confident while experiencing it -- a
- childlike delight and a consuming desire to see and know more. I only
- saw part of what was going on, and I only remember part of what I saw,
- and I can communicate only a little of what I remember.
-
- When, dear reader, you have similar experiences, try to see/perceive as
- much as you can, remember as much as you are able (take notes or talk
- into a recorder) and attempt to write down your trip. It is hard to do,
- the results are always less than you hope, but we must all try to express
- these things if we are ever to build a descriptive consensus or even a
- start at understanding!
-
- Stay High and Stay Free,
-
- Gracie and Zarkov
-